Positioning oneself for success…..

There have been a number of articles recently about findings by Patti Wood – a body language expert – around what your sleeping positions reveals about the state of your relationship. Patti tells us that:

Because your subconscious mind controls the way you sleep with your partner, sleep body language can be an amazingly accurate way to assess what’s going on in your relationship.

A curious assertion, given the unconscious state in which us humans find ourselves in each night, powerless to stop the uncontrollable bodily responses to that which is ‘sleep’.

So not only now must we concern ourselves with a frightening range of sleep disorders – sleep walking, sleep talking, apnea, restless legs, insomnia – we now must consider the hidden messages we are giving our partner but how we find ourselves lying near them. Or not near them as the case may be.

Here are ten positions that describe (I imagine) are some of the possible positions a couple may find themselves them while sharing the confines of a bed. (all credit for the illustrations belong to LittleThings and Maya Borenstein)

sleep positions little things(Explanations of the positions can be found in the LittleThings article)

I must confess that positions 1-9 simply make me think about how completely unworkable these would be for me due to my husband’s snoring. But take away the snoring and I might consider 2, 5, and 6. For me, position 10 is just as bad as a snoring partner – seriously… how could you share a bed with someone who does that to you every night?

While I am a believer in body language, I can understand that the position adopted when a couple enter the bed at night MIGHT mask an unspoken message between the two. However, I do lose belief in the theory of unspoken messages being hidden in how a person positions their body when sleep arrives and takes over.

And what also disturbs me is how much weight people may place on the supposed messages transmitted when their partner is unconscious and succumbing to the physical vagaries of deep, or REM sleep? Lordy, lordy, lordy. If everyone didn’t already have enough to contend with when it comes to getting a good night’s sleep.

Final thought….. I wonder what message Patti Wood thinks I’m trying to send to my husband every night when I head to a separate room.

(I’ll help her. “I love you honey, but I need to sleep. See you in the morning, when I will still love you – but I’ll be well rested”.)

1 thought on “Positioning oneself for success…..”

  1. Thank you!! I have long argued that this is far better for me and my peace of mind…I need sleep not romance when I go to bed. Hard sleep and having anyone next to me snoring, moving, heavy breathing , sleep talking, or even touching me is a distraction. Men are big and heavy and if I want to wrap myself in a blanket and it’s stuck under him I have to get out of bed and search for another one…or I want to change positions and he’s in the way, or if he lays his leg or arm on me and in seconds it feels like a lead weight on me…its all a loss for me and I wake cranky and mean. Instead, when we have slept separately, I wake refreshed and affectionate, so he benefits much more as a consequence. He can sleep anywhere and through anything. I now HAVE to take Xanax to fall into a deep slumber that can not be disturbed but keeps me asleep way too long…how crazy are we to think its healthier to drug yourself than sleep separately in order to prove that a relationship is loving?? My biggest challenge of course is convincing him…I really don’t care how the so-called experts view it, I just don’t want to hurt him when he loves touch and snuggling all through the night but I am suffering and need a better solution than narcotics… or anti-anxiety herbs or drugs. The strange thing is that my pets don’t bother me nearly as much. I think because they are small and relocate if I move…just a lil confession.

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