Snoring: A cause for combat… or concern?

Readers of my blog or book would be very familiar with the fact that a snoring spouse (and sorry guys, but it’s predominantly you) is the number one cause that disrupts a partner’s sleep.

The most frustrating aspect of snoring is that it’s never intentional; it’s not a choice the snorer makes, and unfortunately… none of us can avoid the behaviour. Snoring is going to happen to just about all of us either sporadically or temporarily, or for too many of us, as a permanent feature of our sleeping routine.

So how do you manage/respond to/cope with/deal with/live with/not smother with a pillow…. a snoring partner?

It’s a tough question.

For some of us the response is to look at the quieter space a separate bedroom offers. It was really my only option, to deal with a man I loved in so many ways…. but not his nighttime repertoire of snoring melodies.

A common criticism of couples who choose to sleep separately is that they have abandoned their partner; they are not there for them to monitor health conditions, which can include diagnosing severe snoring. This was how my husband Fraser finally had to admit he had sleep apnoea – I was able to describe to him, his interrupted breathing patterns that accompanied his snoring.

If you do happen to fall in love with a snorer, a good place to start is to understand the medical condition that it is. Understanding that, may help you come to terms with the night time interruptions, and maybe help your partner come to terms with their potential medical issues also.

The video below – “How to Know if Snoring is a Sign of a Bigger Problem” was made by students at Carrington College in the USA.

Monica Gomez from Carrington College also provided this information sheet to support the video.

While I am the FIRST person to support finding a place to lay your head at night that allows you to get the sleep you require, I am grateful the time in bed with my husband that helped us identify his apnoea and led to him to seeking specialist help. He now sleeps better – but alas………. he still does snore! And he still manages to emit quite a racket, but he breathes all night and wakes rested.

Best thing is…. we both do. We’ve eliminated the combat and the concern.


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